Heart of the Matter ESPRESSO

Live from Salt Lake City, Utah, this is Heart of the MatterTGNN’s original show where Shawn McCraney deconstructed religion and developed fulfilled theology. ESPRESSO! where we do all we can to worship God in Spirit and in Truth. I’m Shawn McCraneyFounder of TGNN and developer of the fulfilled perspective—calling people to faith outside of religion., your host.

Launching Heart of the Matter II

Show 52 Mallory McCraney

Prayer

Remember, on Tuesday, October 31st – a Halloween and the 500th Anniversary of Martin Luther nailing his 95 Thesis on the door of Wittenberg – we are launching out in a bold (VERY BOLD) direction with Heart of the Matter. We are calling the show, Heart of the Matter II. Where Heart of the Matter I was all about why Mormonism is off, HOTM II is about what to do about it now – and what to avoid. In the realm of avoidance, we are going to get very specific – boldly naming church names and explaining why former LDS people should avoid those churches at all costs. We are doing this out of love for people. To me, when churches are willing to take a person out of one form of bondage and to put them in another form they deserve to be outed – no holds barred.

And outed they will be. So . . . If you are a church that demands tithes of your congregates, in the name of God, expect to be on the hit list. If you are a church that teaches five point Calvinism you are certainly on the list as well as presenting yourselves as having ANY sort of authority over people. If you are frightening people with non-contextual threats of Jesus returning at any minute you are on the list. And if you are telling people that their loved ones are going to an eternal hell after this life you are on the list too.

Churches to Avoid

Off the top of my head, the people of

• South Mountain churches

• Calvary Chapels

• K2

• The Rock

• Lifeline Community

• And any Orthodox Presbyterian nightmare will be on the block.

Why? We have worked very hard to help set people free from the LDS religion and YOU MOFO’s have in some degree or another put them back in chains. Get ready. Spread the Word. Tuesday Night, October 31st 2017 – the New Heart of the Matter II!

(Beat) So . . . twinkle . . .

Here on the stage is the last of my immediate family to date to be interviewed. Mallory – my oldest, with her husband Niklas and their two handsome sons, Lazer and Samson. The boys get off the hook tonight as Mallory and I are gonna talk. So, thank you men for being seen on the show. (Boys leave)

Reflecting on Parenting

Of the three girls I have personally had most sorry and experienced the most shame as a parent in and through my relationship to Mallory. Not because of her but because I lacked the skills to raise her up in real love for the first 18 or so years of her life. Like many parents, especially LDS parents, I thought what I was doing was loving and good but when I look back I was ill-equipped and simply fearful that Mallory would fail to represent to the world in how I wanted her to be seen.

Born with a natural anxiety and yearning to grow up as fast as she humanly could, I responded to this make-up by adding more to her anxiety, not less. I wanted conformity and complicity toward my views – and she was who she was. One night when she was no more than six months old, Mary was out at a relief society function and I was left to watch her – which was a rarity. And she started crying – and crying, and crying. Here I am this mass of contradictions and testosterone without any real skill with babies trying to calm a baby that would not stop.

To my great shame I finally picked her up under her little arms from her crib and strongly shook her and shouted, “stop it, stop it, stop it.” With God as my witness that baby looked back right into my eyes, her eyes wide with anger, and she screamed back at me! – as if to say, “I am in here. I am troubled. Don’t yell at me.” It was the voice of God, I swear to you, telling me that I was out of bounds with my reaction. And I took her to my shoulder breaking out in tears and telling her that I was so sorry.

It was a pivotal moment in my life as a dad of infants. And one I would have to relearn with toddlers, children, teens, and adult children. Looking back, THE answer, the solution, is of course love, as defined by the New Testament.

The Complexities of Parenting and Personal Growth

– love that is kind, peaceful, patient, longsuffering, gentle, not accusatory, not selfish. It is the culmination of these kinds of things I learned as a parent in my relationship to Mallory that bring me so much pain as a person today – the memories of my failures, my ways, my stupidity. As she grew I maintained an approach to her that was stern and strict and again, it was all about how I wanted to be seen by my watching LDS family and friends. But my Mallory, like her Dad, had a will. I mean, in her flesh she is tough.

Once in high school she was riding her bike and a carload of boys drove by and threw something at her. Maniacally she rode as fast as she could to the school parking lot, found their car – and slit their tires. Tough. As a college freshman at NYU she made honed her music skills and made money by singing in the subways and parks in NYC. Skills we benefit by greatly here at CAMPUS. But before we get to the present, I want to take a look at a clip taken from a show in _____ where Mallory, not a believer in God, was on Heart of the Matter with me. (RUN CLIP)

So, first take us to your LDS experience, and then up to the point where you came to know God.

A Father's Reflection and Apology

I’ve said this before to Mallory, but I want to make it part of our recorded history – I am so very, very sorry for the kind of dad I was to you in your early life. I wish I would have been kinder, more patient, more understanding and less about how things looked. So with all of that under our feet, let’s turn it over to you to discuss your early thoughts about God, religion, Mormonism etc. I think your life and perspectives will really go a long way to helping others who battle with the stressors of life as young mothers, etc. So, let’s begin with some recollections on Mormonism and where you wound up once Mom and I left.

Music and Rebirth Experience

MUSIC Our family is very, very much into music and has been for generations. Your sister once asked me my five favorite musicians of all time and I said: Tool Dixie Chicks Bad Religion Mallory McCraney And X (I think)? But what is most fascinating is how God has taken your innate ability to cram tons of words into your songs and brought you right into His arms to do what with scripture.

Coping Mechanisms and Faith

Family history of drug abuse and drug addiction. Great Grandparents on both sides lives ruined by drugs or alcohol. My brother died trying to overcome addiction and Mallory’s cousin Zach is somewhat of a hero to the pot community writ large as he is known as Jesus Hands on line and is the guy who changed the Hollywood sign recently to read Hollyweed. Drugs and drug abuse has a history of destroying lives in our family and so we have tried hard to keep it control. That being said, we also have a propensity toward self-medication because of our genetic make-up and the circumstances in our lives (like what I mentioned about your early life circumstances).

So, where and how does substance use fit into the life of a believer in your estimation? Dogma that with Jesus substances are not needed? If we allow ourselves we could fall prey to abusing substances. Both of all – all of us. FOOD. CAFFIENE. SEX. POT. ALCOHOL and all the rest from there. All flesh but in some people far more pressing than in others. Of course we try to tie holiness to it but bottom line it is NOT an equal playing field, is it?

Because someone refuses to use substances could NOT possibly mean they are closer to God. Far too many variables, right? I have trained myself to get high through creation- writing and thinking and presenting – and the pace in which I do it won’t allow for many substances at all. But that is my way of coping.

END WITH

• Reiterate OCTOBER 31st Shows
• November 6th new book in Milk CFG’s